If you’ve been back to the same person’s page 10 times today, it’s time to send him/her a message, otherwise you might become known as a ‘lurker,’ essentially the Peeping Tom of the online dating world, who is basically there to look at other people’s profiles and do god-knows-what while looking at them. Thirdly, if someone sends a message to you, it’s usually good form to send them something back.Now, if their message to you is at all off-putting (sexually-charged, offensive, too short to glean anything from, etc), then just delete it and go on with your day.Hopefully I don’t have to go any further with why this is the wrong approach because, damn, it’s REALLY the wrong approach. This is a rule that applies to interacting in person as well, but it’s especially important in the online dating scene because it can be hard to get people to reply to you (whether due to the massive amounts of mail they get everyday or simply because they don’t know how to respond to your list introduction [see Tip 6]).The far better tactic is to take it slow, like you would meeting someone in real life (generally, at least..maybe the person above is used to doing the same thing in person? Introduce yourself in a way that is clear enough that the other person isn’t freaked out or caught off guard, but intriguing enough that they want to write you back, find out more, and strike up a conversation. Asking a few intelligent, well thought out questions, however, gives them a reason to respond, while at the same time showing something about yourself (‘if he knows enough to ask about that, he must be an MGMT fan, too! Asking good questions can help you steer the conversation while at the same time allowing you to be an active listener; that is, you are totally focused on what the other person is saying, and therefore finding out exactly what you want to know about them (which is one of the benefits of online dating…if you find out they are a Neo-Nazi or infrequent bather or something like that, you can ease your way out of the conversation by not asking any more questions).
Stay away from the following words when describing yourself in your online profile so you don't attract (or become) an unwanted virtual creep.It’s amazing how many people will complain that they’ve had no luck with online dating and then I’ll take a look at their profile and there won’t be any pictures and most of the fields aren’t filled out.“I don’t want my picture up on a dating site,” they say. There’s no way you’re going to find great people to date online if you don’t have enough commitment to post at least one picture and fill out 90% of the fields on your profile page.In the real world, this usually amounts to how you dress, how you style your hair, how polished your shoes are, etc.In the wonderful world of online dating, however, you have myriad different levels of information you can display.